What does 'Restless' mean?
Find out what Restless means. Restless is explained by Ron Alexander - author of Don't Tell Me What To Do: A Spiritual Memoir
RestlessMonths passed, summer rolled into fall, the roar of winter wind and snow came and I grew more restless and rebellious in school, more resentful of living in the backwoods, and more hateful of Ada Mama. She threatened me with a freshly cut switch every night, which was the only way I would go out into freezing weather to church. She had the stamina and strength to wrestle me to the floor, fight through my entangled arms, hold me back while she targeted bare flesh with a switch.
Two months into Spring, on May 5, 1959, things changed. I was sitting up in my bed when Ada Mama gave me my orders for the night.
“Do what I tell you, boy! Get that homework done. It’s almost time for you to go to bed.” I had already tried to do my homework on this night, one of the few times I actually made an effort. I couldn't figure out how to do my homework and neither could she. I slowly reached for my writing book and pencil, turned a few pages and began drawing stick men, pretending to be working on my homework.
She moved about the room, fussing at me under her breath, talking to herself, calling out the Lord's name, singing and clapping her hands together all the while standing in the middle of the floor, twisting her head upward and screaming at the top of her voice.
“Lawdy, Lawdy, I’s don't know what's wrong with me tonight but I's hoping to live to see another day if that's what yo' wont,” she said. “My body and my head aches, my bones aches, I's feeling soo' light headed. I's wont to finish raising this her' boy. Lawdy, yo' know that I loves this little boy and I's wont the best fo’ him.”
She poured out something dark and thick into a glass, mixed in water, drank it down real fast, while coughing and smacking her lips together. She climbed into her bed. The room smelled like the onion juice she once tried to make me drink when I had a cold.
“Ronnie,” she said to me from her bed, “if there's a thing wrong with me in the morning, I wont you to go 'cross the tracks and tell somebody. You hear me, boy? I’s talking to you!” she shouted, the gold tooth flashing at me. “Don’t make me take a switch to you tonight!”
I looked into her chicken eyes and acted like I didn't hear her. I pulled the cover over my head and went to sleep.